I am currently blogging, along with my daughter, all the way through the alphabet. Check out how the idea started, and get the rules here. I am a narcissist. So are you. I don’t mean I have a psychiatric disorder. I don’t mean I stand in front of a mirror admiring myself for hours every day.Continue reading “N is for Narcissism”
Category Archives: RELATIONSHIP STUFF
A is for Anxiety
artwork by Surrealist on Flickr.com I am currently blogging, along with my daughter, all the way through the alphabet. Check out how the idea started, and get the rules here. Anxiety has been one of the guiding forces of my life, determining more about the way I live day to day than almost anything else.Continue reading “A is for Anxiety”
Getting Trashed vs. Cleaning Up
photos by just another picture We live in a culture that will support and encourage you to run from your problems in any way possible. Stop by the bar every night and have a few beers. Make sure you have alcohol at your parties, so everyone can loosen up and have a good time. IfContinue reading “Getting Trashed vs. Cleaning Up”
The Shadow
Have you ever gotten to a point where you realized, somehow, that you were a mess? Have you ever gone through a time where you discovered deep in yourself some dark fear, or some deep insecurity, or some profound feeling of insufficiency that scared you? Have you ever seen something in yourself that bothered youContinue reading “The Shadow”
How To Relate To Your Kids
No parent is perfect. Certainly my wife and I have not been perfect parents, but I think we have succeeded in doing what is most important, which is creating an atmosphere of openness between us and our kids. Most parents want more than anything to do a good job, but I work with parents allContinue reading “How To Relate To Your Kids”
Openness
The Case for Being Closed I was raised in a church tradition that almost discouraged openness. We were taught (by some very well-intentioned people, I should say) that we have to be careful what we allow ourselves to be open to. After all, evil (the devil) was around every corner. That’s Biblical, right? 1 PeterContinue reading “Openness”
Characteristics of Thoughtful People
I believe most people do not live very thoughtfully. This is not to say I believe most people are incapable of doing so, simply that it is not a priority for most, and for different reasons. I did not begin thinking a lot because of my careers as a college professor, pastor, and counselor. Rather,Continue reading “Characteristics of Thoughtful People”
On Deciding…
We live in a world dominated by feelings. That wouldn’t be much of a problem, except that this feeling-dominated world thinks it’s rational. A feeling-dominated world that thinks it’s rational demeans the opinions of religious people because they are “irrational,” but it demeans those opinions for irrational reasons. Feeling-dominated people do not know how toContinue reading “On Deciding…”
On changing…
One of the secrets of life is to be honestly who you are. Who others want you to be, who you used to be, and who you may some day become … these are fantasies. To be honestly who you are is to give up your illusions and face today with courage. — Bill PurdinContinue reading “On changing…”
Shaking “the shoulds”
Do you have a bad case of “the shoulds”? One of the most common questions I hear in the ministry and in counseling is, “How do I get (insert person’s name) to (insert activity or insight).” For example, “How do I get my brother to start making better dating choices?” Or, “How do I getContinue reading “Shaking “the shoulds””
Temp Arbor 